Jobber the . . . hut, on a DC BikeShare Bike.
To keep the new 2013 momentum up, here's a neighborly post about a neighbor. He lives very nearby, but I won't reveal his exact whereabouts. He's the youngest NYT op-ed columnist in history, and his name rhymes with "hut" (I think). And he's a Republican/conservative . . . .
Anyhoo . . . there's an interesting question here. Why would Jobber the ". . . hut" and his wife and ONE CHILD (God, man, begin to re-populate the Earth!!!) live on/in Capitol Hill? It's one of the leading liberal neighborhoods, and, I think, the most under-rated. There are so many Republican places to live in the greater D.C. area. Reston! McLean! Even parts of Arlington, Alexandria. Falls Church. Heck, even N.W. D.C. (Capitol Hill is mostly N.E. or, shudder, S.E.) (j/k).
Why does Jobber the . . . hut live on Capitol Hill?
Two (non-mutually exclusive) options:
(1) He actually likes a diverse, vibrant, urban environment, with local markets, interesting people. The homogeneity of the (GOP) suburbs is not appealing.
(2) He likes to play the outsider, and where else will he be as much of an outsider than in Capitol Hill, where all his neighbors are LIBERALS, many of whom work for the GOVERNMENT, and the rest for those NGOs.
Vote in the comments, 1, 2, or both. Either way, Jobber the . . . hut is a stain on the undershorts of humankind.
Update: My sources tell me that the . . . hut family may be preggers. To which I say, good for them. But consider carefully entrusting your . . . hut-lings to the TLC of the Catholic clergy/Catholic schools. Buggery and such. This has been well documented. There are actually some decent public schools . . . where you choose to live . . . Maybe join the community? Join the team? Wouldn't that be the conservative thing to do? Wouldn't D. Brooks mention "little platoons" in this context? Burke? Or is it opt out, and play the outsider in a community in which you reside/live/enjoy the benefits but refuse to carry the burden?