Family Values (Dukes of Hazzard Edition)

So I was watching the Today show for a few minutes this morning, and Matt Lauer interviewed Ben Jones--yes, the actor who played the trusty mechanic "Cooter" from the 1970's "Dukes of Hazzard" tv show. Jones was very critical of the new "film" based on the tv show because the new movie is not consistent with the family values portrayed on the tv show.

'R ya scratchin' yer noggin yet?

Now, hard-hitting interviewer that he is, Lauer pushed Cooter on such points as Daisy Duke's cut-off shorts and how that pushed the limits of its times. And Cooter replied that the new movie--he has just read the script, mind you--was (paraphrase, but close) "a non-stop hoochie coochie show." Now, a number of things spring immediately . . . to mind. First, what would the script to a non-stop hoochie coochie show look like? Would there be dialogue? Or just, er, stage directions?

Second, has the term "hoochie coochie show" ever been used on morning television before? And what percentage of the television audience understood what Jones had just said?

Third, from the television commercials for the new movie, it looks like one non-stop car chase, with the General Lee (sans Confederate battle flag) making several jumps. Now that's faithful to the original show. My question here: will the Duke boys still shoot arrows with sticks of dynamite strapped to them? Or is that too "al-Cracker"? (Remember--the Duke boys were ex-cons, so they couldn't carry guns. But apparently, they could possess high explosives.)

BTW--did you ever wonder about the geography of Hazzard County. I think it was in Georgia. It was near Atlanta, sort-of, and country-western bands used to travel through there and get caught in Roscoe's speedtrap. But the interesting question is why was the predominant geographical feature the dry river bed? How many dry river beds can there be in Georgia, which is not a dry state? And what about the Hazzard County highway commission? Couldn't they fix any of those old bridges--the ones that were always out when the General Lee was just about to go flying--and when the show was about to cut for a commercial, with the Waylon Jennings voice-over?