Impending Apocalypse: Indisputable Evidence

Canada defeats Team U.S.A. in baseball, 8-6, and (Team U.S.A.) is in danger of elimination from the World Baseball Classic. To move on, Team U.S.A. needs to beat South Africa (they play baseball in South Africa?) and for Canada to beat Mexico. If Mexico wins, the U.S. advances if Mexico score more than two runs. (I won't pretend to understand that last sentence. That's what it said in the paper.)

On the same day, new allegations that Bonds used steroids during his record-setting season(s). Nothing to see here, folks, move along.